Day 155

Yep, that's how long since I put my foot down and said, screw being fat! For real, it just had to get pissed off enough about it.  And then I lost 20 lbs and I wasn't angry anymore.

Did you know that anger can lead to good things?

It's true.

And you know what happened when I stopped being angry with myself?

I gained 3 pounds back.

It took me 2 months but at that rate we are talking 12 lbs a year and that's not really ok with me.
But heres the thing, I'm not really in that angry place anymore so I had to find something else. I searched and searched and then I went running last Saturday morning.

Somewhere in that 4 miles and through the shin pain I realized how happy I was. Not in general. Not my life is so great kind of happy. {ha! yeeeaaahhhhhhh, let me tell ya about my 'life' lately. sigh.....}

Just happy to be out running.  With Shin Pain. Happy that I could.

And that thought brought me back to the beginning.  My sister had sent out an email about running a race together and somewhere in it she said  'Because I Can'.

And suddenly it all made sense again.

*****

Today's Workout

Ran the canal road today. Ryan and his friend rode bikes along with me. 2.6 miles out and back. Shins screaming at me the whole second half. I've got to get some new shoes, it's crazzzzy to me that I have actually worn out these running shoes.

I had Barry's voice in my head the whole time, 'you don't really push yourself' which is his way of saying I don't really believe in myself. It's true. I give up too quickly. So today I only took 30 second walking breaks instead of 2 minutes.  Victory for the day!

Came home to the other 3 kids and a sleeping husband and re-established order in the house. ;) Then did this Leg Blaster workout for 25 minutes.  It's much harder with a 1 year old at your feet demanding your attention.

He's just going to have to learn that a healthy and fit mommy is a happy mommy!