Progress

I don't blog anymore but I've been wanting to get together some progress photos for myself for a while and once I did it, I was pretty darn proud. I also posted a bit of a rant on Facebook awhile back after getting really annoyed with people wanting to know what 'magic potion' I was taking and had an old friend ask to see pictures.

Facebook Post:
I've lost enough weight (32lbs with another 25 to go) now that people are starting to comment on it, Thank you! However the next comment is alway along the lines of "what's your secret?" It drives me crazy, there is no supplement, or diet or magical workout. Eat fresh food and less crap. Say goodbye to the soda and hello to water, lots of water. Lift a lot of weights and make sure they are heavy. Don't leave the gym until you are soaking wet and you smell. When you're so sore you can't walk down the stairs, then you're doing something right. I call it literally working my ass off. That's my secret.

 Not sure I'd like them on Facebook but I'll share them here.

October 2010.

I was about to turn 32 and my 4th (and last) baby was 10 months old. Funny thing is I remember thinking I didn't think I was that big I just wanted to be healthier and more active. 

I was 204 lbs.

Yikes.

January 2011, Down 20 pounds, about 184. I did Jillian Michaels DVDs and the elliptical for 3 months and then started Couch to 10K in January.

Ragnar June 2011

I lost 5 more pounds down to 180 but losing weight when learning to run was very hard for me. Honestly I felt very skinny here but still struggled with emotional eating.

A ran about a 13 min mile here.

August 2011

178 pounds

Quit working out about this time.

Top pix are August 2011

Bottom pix are November 2011 in Hawaii

I had gained about 7 pounds back to 185.

Summer 2012

In 2012 I went back to college, worked out sporadically, ate well off and on.

We had family pictures taken in July and they are the first pictures I have ever had printed and felt I looked ok. I attribute that to the confidence I found in exercise.

October 2012

By my 34th birthday I had gained another 9 pounds back to 194. In my second semester of school I had an epiphany about how much I could actually accomplish when I put my mind to it. I had 4 kids and I was going to school full time and pulling a 3.7 GPA. Suddenly I knew I could lose more weight and then instead of thinking I needed it, I suddenly really wanted it.

I spent December 2012 planning what I wanted and how I would get there. 

I wanted to learn to run, not jog and walk. RUN. 

I wanted to learn to swim. I wanted to be 145 pounds. I wanted to keep up with my kids.  

I wanted to be strong. Not skinny. Strong.  

I didn't even take pictures because it wasn't really my main focus.

So I started the Couch to 5K program over for the 3rd time and I signed up for a swim class.

That swim class was possibly one of the best things I've ever done for myself. It was hard. It kicked my but every time. It challenged me and left me wanted to more.  My instructor was awesome! 

And the weight started falling off. 

So did the emotion baggage and lack of confidence and the depression.

I had also signed up for a Biggest Loser Contest at my gym in January. It help hold me accountable but they didn't give you any directions, it was all up to me. My first weigh in the 3rd week of January was 194, my last weigh in the 2nd week of March was 174. 

My pants were literally falling down and I needed a new belt. 

That was fun.

In April I hit a plateau and couldn't get past 170. So I took a step back and gave myself a little test to see if I could maintain the weight for a month.  I ate more and let myself have treats but I still went to the gym 5-6 days a week and kept on my running plan. 

By May I was ready to pick it up again and lost a few more pounds down to 166.4.

As fun as the number on the scale is to see, I have discovered that it is much more fun to jump in the pool and swim laps for 45 mins and not feel like I'm going to die. Fun is heading out for a run and not stopping until mile 3 for a walk break and then realizing it was only my head that thought I needed to walk because my body is fine and so I walk 1 min and then RUN another 3 miles. Fun is seeing my blood pressure go from 130/90 to 105/60 and my heart rate from 75 to 55 bpm. Fun is now running a 10 to 10:30 min mile.

Fun is having my 11 year old son want to go running with me and him not be able to keep up. (Because I let him go with me in 2011 and he would literally lap me until I was in tears and wouldn't allow him to go with me anymore.)  Fun is having my kids look at these pictures and say "Wow Mom! You've lost a lot of weight. I don't even remember you being big like that."

I have lost 37 pounds and would like to lose another 22. I will never say it's not about the number, get real, it is about the number, it may not be the number I originally thought but the number counts. It's about the fit of your clothes and putting on a swimming suit without shame. It's about feeling like you want to participate in life instead of sitting on the couch under a blanket. It's about learning you are stronger than you thought you were, you can push yourself harder than you knew you could. 

I never though I'd be that person getting up early to run and planning my day around the gym because it's is that important to me. But I am.  It's as simple as this...I could sit around being fat and taking antidepressants that don't really fix anything or I can exercise every day, feel great and be skinny.  I'll take the later. Trust me, the pain of working out is way better than the emotion pain of being the fat girl.

I think I'll try to update this with new pictures as I reach my goals this year, which are... 

*Ragnar-Wasatch Back in June

*The Huntsville Half Marathon in September

*And my original goal set back in December is to be 145 by my 35th birthday in October

Now Get Out and Be Awesome!

Yes

YOU

You are not your bra size, nor are you the width of your waist, nor are you the slenderness of your calves. You are not your hair color, your skin color, nor are you a shade of lipstick. Your shoe size is of no consequence. You are not defined by the amount of attention you get from males, females, or any combination thereof. You are not the number of sit-ups you can do, nor are you the number of calories in a day. You are not your mustache. You are not the hair on your legs. You are not a little red-dress. You are not the amalgam of these things.

You are the content of your character. You are the ambitions that drive you. You are the goals that you set. You are the things that you laugh at and the words that you say. You are the thoughts that you think and the things you wonder. You are beautiful and desirable not for the clique you attend, but for the spark of life within you that compels you to make your life a full and meaningful one. You are beautiful not for the shape of the vessel, but for the volume of the soul it carries.

Anyone have a least favorite body part?

My first reply to this question would be my stomach.

Growing up I always had a very flat stomach. And friends would comment on it constantly, wishing their own could be as flat. After 4 kids…it is stretched to hell. To Hell I Tell You! I used to work for a plastic surgeon who said my stretch marks are so wide (some are a full 2”) it is impossible to regain the elasticity back with that kind if skin damage. I have a lot of fat to loose there first but a tummy tuck is the only way to repair it. And as much as that bothers me, it has become less of an issue for me as my children grow older. I would do anything for my kids and if you asked me now to destroy my flat stomach for them, I wouldn’t hesitate.

So body part number 2? My calves. They are huge! I’ve never had thin legs, I’m short 5’4”, and long thin legs just aren’t in the cards for me. However I’d love to have very defined muscular legs. My calves I feel are just disproportionately large.

Today I was doing some weights with 2 friends of mine. When Julie says to me “Wow! Look at your calf muscles! That is incredible, I want calves like that!”.

I was dumbfounded. What? Me? My legs? Who are you talking to? Don’t you mean Jana? You know Jana, 5’10”-long-skinny legged-muscle toned-marathon running-Jana?

She laughed and said “no, I’ll never look like Jana, I’m not built that way, but if I could have your calves I’d take em!”

My head is still trying to process this I’ve been standing in front of the mirror flexing and posing and…

I Just Can’t See It!

I wish I could. It takes the mind so much longer to catch up to the progress our bodies are able to achieve.

But you know what? I pulled out my shorts I haven’t worn in 3 years and by damn I’m wearing them! Because someone said my calves look good and I’m choosing to believe her!

An article to share

I know I share a lot of CJane posts but I just can't help it, she is so great.

Weight Doesn't Matter is actually a guest post but I thought it was great too!  I get really tired of hearing all the obesity statistics myself. Not to say they are totally wrong but they are definitely twisted by the media to sell skinny as the only way.